Daniel Davis, LMFT

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Merry Christmas

December 27, 2016 By Daniel Davis, LMFT Leave a Comment

What comes to mind when you hear, “Merry Christmas?”  I remember growing up in the Santa Clara Valley in Northern California, USA, and experiencing the wonder of Christmas as a young child.  I remember going to midnight Mass at Queen of Apostles Catholic Church in San Jose a five minutes’ walk from our family home.  I remember my dad’s voice singing the Hallelujah Chorus from Handel’s Messiah.  Upon returning home, my brother and sister and I, open a present from our mom and dad on Christmas Eve before we go to bed.  We awake early on a dark and cold Christmas morning to open more presents next to our Christmas tree under the bright lights of my father’s eight millimeter (8mm) camera.

What is Christmas?  Jesus being born in a stable in the small town of Bethlehem in the Middle Eastern part of the Roman Empire over two thousand years ago?  The angel Gabriel appears to the Virgin Mary and announces:  “Do not be afraid.  Mary, for you have found favor with God.  And now you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you must name him Jesus.  He will be great and will be called Son of the Most High.”

What does this mean to you?  How do you feel when you hear these words?  They may be vibrant and meaningful.  Yet they also may be lifeless.  Moreover, these ancient words (translated into English) may bring up rage or fear.  As we encounter this story about the first Christmas, we have an opportunity to better understand ourselves as well as our world. There are over 2.2 billion people who are part of Christianity.  Yet religion is different from spirituality.  Our internal experience is a core part of our spirituality.  This is a vital part of what we find meaningful in our lives.  If we choose, it is possible to have a different sense of the meaning of Christmas by finding a new relationship to the story of the birth of Jesus.

Manuel Costa has been leading seminars about the teachings of Jesus for many decades with the Guild for Psychological Studies.  Please watch this video and learn more about how to possibly see from a new life giving perspective:

Blog 59

Filed Under: Becoming Aware (Consciousness), Blog, Spirituality Tagged With: 8mm camera, A Path to Life’s Fullness: A New Perspective on the Teachings of Jesus, angel, bed, being, Bethlehem, book, born in a stable, California, Christianity, Christmas Eve, Christmas morning, eight millimeter, Gabriel, Hallelujah Chorus, Handel’s Messiah, Jesus, Manuel Costa, Merry Christmas, Middle Eastern, midnight Mass, music, presents, Queen of Apostles Catholic Church, religion, Roman Empire, San Jose, Santa Clara Valley, Silicon Valley, singing, spirituality, two thousand years ago, Virgin Mary, voice

Depression and Music

March 1, 2016 By Daniel Davis, LMFT Leave a Comment

Some of the symptoms of depression include low energy, irritability, sadness, physical pain, low self-esteem, self-criticism, hopelessness, crying, and changes in eating and sleeping. The source of these symptoms can be biological, psychological, social or spiritual. One can suffer from low blood sugar or a low level of testosterone. Our beliefs can contribute to symptoms of depression. A bad marriage can lead to these symptoms. We may be in a spiritual crisis, lacking meaning in our life. As we transition from one set of beliefs about reality to another set of beliefs, we often feel loss.

When we experience loss, consciously experiencing and expressing our sadness enables us to integrate the loss. Expressing anger is also a part of the process of grieving loss. When we resist our feelings, we may feel numb. When people experience depression, they often describe their bodies as feeling numb. Often we avoid consciously experiencing our emotions and expressing them, when we fear being overwhelmed by them. When we fear being overwhelmed by emotions, we find ways to block our feelings. Often, these are not conscious choices to not feel.

Most often, we learned early in our lives to control our feelings by developing defenses. We may breathe in a shallow way and tighten our muscles to resist emotions. These defenses to consciously experiencing our sadness or anger can lead to depressive symptoms.

Unfortunately, feeling depressed is pretty awful. Depression is not good for our physical health. We can learn to express our feelings. One way to do this is with another person who is comfortable with emotion and affirms your experience of your emotions. In this way, we have a corrective emotional experience which enables us to learn to consciously experience and express our feelings.

Music is an outstanding way to consciously experience feelings. “When the time comes that you’re ready to begin facing your emotions, music that speaks to your heart can help you begin to release your pain,” writes Maureen Draper.

I can pick music which enables me to cry. The process of crying enables me to move forward with my grief and integrate the reality of my life without my beloved. When I hear a John Denver song, I often think of my dad. We can associate certain songs or musicians with a loved one who has passed on. Maureen writes: “Music that reminds you of a loved one brings to the surface whatever may not have been finished or unsaid between you.”

Art of all kinds, be it paintings, poems, stories, film or music, can evoke emotion. Great art reaches us emotionally, and we vicariously experience something important to us. This is why we can be so drawn to a certain author or musician. The beauty of art can move us in countless ways. We can cry with awe when listen to Adagio with Strings by Barber. We may experience exhilaration or hope when listening to Mozart or the Beatles.

Listening to music can be profoundly comforting. The music from our childhood can bring us feelings of being protected and nurtured by our parents as a child. I can remember the song, “Puff the Magic Dragon” from my childhood. Many songs from this era remind me of the emotions of my childhood.

When we are alone with our grief in the middle of the night, music can help us feel the comfort of being in our mother’s arms as a child. Music from early in a relationship with our husband or wife can bring up the emotions of falling in love, which are very healthy for our bodies.

We can use music to – in a sense – move backward in time to recapture hidden emotions and memories. Some may wish to feel the feeling of safety by imagining being held by the divine during our darkest hour of pain. Music can remind us of this kind of love.

Perhaps, finding the core of who we are is the most powerful dynamic to resolving depressive symptoms. Music is a powerful elixir to find the essence of our self. Please watch this video by pianist and author, Maureen Draper, about music and depression:

Filed Under: Art, Blog, Emotions Tagged With: beliefs, biological, changes, crying, depression, eating changes, emotion, energy, Falling in love, grief, hopelessness, loss, low irritability, Maureen Draper, memories, music, numb, physical pain, pianist, psychological, recapture hidden emotions, sadness, self-criticism, self-esteem low, sleeping, social, spiritual, symptoms

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About Daniel Davis, LMFT

I create an environment where clients experience their unique significance, authentic empowerment, and profound acceptance and collaborate with clients to identify solutions to their current crises. For more information on how I can help you, contact me today by calling 408-249-0014 or emailing info@danieldavislmft.com. I look forward to speaking with you! Read More…

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I provide Virtual Counseling, E-Counseling, and Online Counseling and Psychotherapy Services as well as Phone Therapy Sessions to residents of California. As such, you can access any of my services at a location of your choosing. Please contact me today for more information and to find out how I can help you!

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Daniel Davis, M.A., LMFT
Counselor in Santa Clara, CA
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